My crazy friend she, the one who the mess about with that tonty boy, kind a plicky plicky with the strong lean amazon warrior body women find hard to resist, therefore overlooking the lack of brain cells and the fact he like talk to himself, came to tell me about she fright the other day. When me done hear the whole story, I tell she them is a match when it come to the level of loconess & love of the insane life.

The other night when she wake up from a late- late siesta, she sneak off to the I & I bar to hail we friend from kindergarten who is boss-man over there now. The one who like to tell people that he know us from when we was little girls running around with them cheap panty with the big lace flowers in the back we does buy from cross the border in Chetumal like thirty seven years ago.

She had forgotton she promised the boy she was gonna stop by and hail him that night. She never did gone to visit him at the boat at the tip of the dock where he sleep like guard man for them people he work for. He still believe her when all she ever says to him is lies.
"I told him before take my word as nothing" but he still like have hope, she says.

So the next mawning he neva show up at she doorstep to make the coffee on the lee fireheart outside like he usual but she never worry. Not till she say he pass her on the street like he never know her before and when she hail him, he buck speed down the road, bend the corner and appear again like one horror movie about to start. She say she could not believe her eyes and took she sunglasses off and wipe them and look again quick just in case she not belizeing what she seeing.

Yes, for sure, he coming back down the street towards she with one machete ina one hand and one knife ina the other and he look stark raving mad talking to himself which, like if you know him, not too surprising but when accompanied by weapons, you should worry she say.

She never plan to stick around to find out the outcome of this here madness, so she high tail behind the grape trees along the beach and made it to the lee snorkel shop to dodge impending trouble & hide out behind it. Sure enough she say, he walk up the street pass she, with some angry talk spewing loudly from his normal soft spoken lips, and all she could make out in the gibberish was she name, she sure she heard it, so she know the anger directed to she. She say all the blood drain from she body like he already chop she to lee pieces. ...
"one lie too many might have flipped the switch again in he head but this time more wires got crossed.

Then next day when everything cool down, she spot machete warrior on a dock talking to a gringa tourist he had recently acquired, one of them thats here on sex safari and because of that, he ignored her. She say fear then turn to jealousy and she know she playing crazy now but she walk up the bridge anyway to confront the situation.

"You want to chase me down the street with a machete because you think I gone out to play around & here you is with your white gial and your guilty mind turning things around on me?
This why you want to kill me?
So you is could run off with this here woman???"

"Bway, no play with me unless you want to really see what crazy look like!"

She not know how she got so brave (not once she used the word stupid), must have been the Guinness she says. He just looked at her like he not know what she talking about trying to impress the white woman she thought.

He tells she he not chasing her down no street with machete and knife, that's she imagination at work, even though the whole village had seen him bruk loose in what the old time spanish people from the island would call Chillious which is uncontrolable rage under the influence of alcohol.
So since he not remember, probably due to the quart of rum witness' say he had clutched under his armpit then, couldn't explain why he was playing crazy yesterday, she say , and look at her like she the one crazy.
Why two crazy people can't understand each other is beyond me.

The white woman was ready to jump in the sea but she assured her she not there to harm her so big gial sit back down stressed out and quiet.

"She look like she didn't want to make any sudden moves lest I mis-interpret her actions as aggression and we end up in a wrestle on the bridge" she says "so for a while there while I was yelling, she looked like she had froze in time.

So she say, not wanting to get into no police business, she walk down the bridge and gone to she friend by the fruit stand and start to guzzle more Guinness with them gials over there, all the while stalking the bridge where them at. When she see some hours pass and they don't come down off the moonlit bridge yet, she drunkenness increased she jealousy and bravery and she headed back out to them.

This time now them disappear off the dock and two sailboats tie up at the tip. She start to holler his name but no answer so she say miracle she never land in the water trying to pull the boat in and trying to jump on board in the dark. She finally manage and almost stumbled on a person lieing on the bow of the boat. She shake the man ready for quarrel but when the boy turn around, was another watchman vex she wake him, so she on the wrong boat. He obivous not good watchman with all the noise she been making then again, he might a been hoping she drop a sea.

She say another good fifteen minutes just to try and dis-embark on wobbly legs, the motion of the ocean combined with several Guinness was producing a hallucinogenic effect and things start looking blurry. She manage somehow and next fifteen minutes later she on the other boat. By now a good forty five minutes a pass and she getting more vex by the minute she cant find them. She thinks them gone out on moonlit cruise in the little dinghy to avoid she and she eventually gone home alone to sleep it off and the next day them make up after all the craziness.

She "I was the hunted the day before,
he was the hunted yesterday so we call that in our crazy world

ME: "Gial if this man chop you and I have to go talk at your funeral,
I'm gonna say, she asked for it,
not to mek this whole thing joke!"
She: "well if you have to talk at mi funeral, mek sure you tell them that I enjoyed every exciting minute of my life, even the fear based ones"