WELCOME TO CAYE COOKOO, Happy Tequila to you!

There we were at the run down Split Bar, a couple island girls minding their own business and enjoying one barrel rum & the scenery of youthful hard bodies on delicious looking young men, perched like seagulls on the broken cement sea wall.
Here we were trying to pass the slow season in good spirits with close friends, when they arrived! Loud & boisterous big spenders: fruity rum punch women drinkers accompanied by beer guzzling men in heat, here visiting from beloved sister island.

On this day, we were caught in the middle of imported madness once again, as is the norm for decades, when the "First World educated type" come from our neighboring high end island to get jiggy with it. They pull ashore on the odd weekend, or on day tours in their fancy boat, to our reggage inspired, rustic, broken down, rasta inspired (some of the patrons themselves match the description of the bar) little beach bar at the Split, spilling out of their boats excitedly to mingle with our laid back tribe. Most important for us, beside the fact that we want you to enjoy yourselves, is that you are spending money & helping the island's econmy, leave something positive behind!

We heard the Texans coming before we could see them turn the bend by the mangrove to the West of the Split. They tied up on the fallen tree stump at the edge of the jagged sea weed shoreline & got off the boat, swaggering & talking loudly so that everyone at the bar 60 yards away could hear. We were already looking anyway & everyone there already knew what type of an afternoon to anticipate. They did not disappoint.

With the lively athmosphere at the Split - already filled with young, educated, goodlooking backpackers, great Caribbean music. accompanied by azure waters, puffy white clouds & happy hour - we're positive the First worlders sensed they had arrived at the place they can let it all hang out and they were right.

Hell, the Caye Caulker Split is well known globally & has become legendary, not necessarily because of the locals, the scenery, but for the feeling of feeling free in the Caribbean! There are times when the locals themselves are the tourist attraction, so its nice when others show up to entertain us.

We typically live our lives on this island feeling a little caged, while we let those who pass through our zoo run free & wild. I'm not saying we are angels here, creatures have a way of adapting to their changing environment and every now and again, the animal in us is set free, even in the cage under prying eyes.

Some consider themselves missionary-like who come to Caye CooKoo to teach us "Third World primitives" as we were recently called in International News regarding the incident at UCLA, how to behave in First World...LOL.

The lesson of this day?
How to do body shots!

Texans: (Shouting at the Bar): "Let the Texan's show Ya'all how we do it back in Texas!!"



Texan to Local: "Come here little girl, want to have a belly shot?
Come on try it, you'll like it!"

Texans: "YeeHaaawwwww"
(whenever someone downed another shot from another orifice or crack)

Locals: "YeeHaaaawwww.....(yawn)" seen it too many times before and not just from the Texans.

Other First World Wives of ex-pats, living on sister island (especially those whose husbands spend all their free time in bars drinking), come to Caye Caulker to do their debauchery as well. They happily find Caye Cookoo's Mandingos to fill their otherwise boring free time with. So as not to lose their up-standing positions in their status driven island community, they gladly travel the 1/2 hour by water taxi, as there is an entirely different culture to be found here.

"Come to Caye Caulker & set yourself Free!"
Expect...the coconut wireless! Nothing much misses the eyes or ears in these small rumor rampant little Caribe isles off the coast of Belize. Anyway, as long as you are not breaking the law, SPEND LOTS OF MONEY to help our local economy (especially in this slowest of slow seasons) -> YES, that makes some of the madness more tolerable.


Well it's your world, we just trying to survive in it.

Come Enjoy Caye Caulker!